Home » Glossary » Dating Jargon » Benching





Benching can be broken down into two categories:

1) When you’re casually dating someone, and don’t know where the relationship is going, so you put them on hold while you figure out your options.

2) If you are in a relationship but are unwilling to let your partner move on with someone else.

Technology has made both of these scenarios incredibly easy to carry out. Dating sites/apps create an environment where you can always see what else is available and consider leapfrogging from one relationship to the other without having to complicate or end the one you are currently in.

If you are curious if you are being benched, then be on the lookout for long periods of no communication or bouts of your partner disappearing for extended periods of time without explanation, only to come back or send a flirty text to check in.


Josh had been seeing Holly for a few months so he could sense that she wanted to get serious and exclusive, but he wasn’t certain he wanted to stop dating other people yet. When he realized this he became evasive, dating other women and not replying for extended periods of time before checking in to see if she wanted to have a night out. Holly would often ask why he was being so evasive, but Josh would quickly change the subject. He didn’t want her to know she was being benched.