Dating Safely

How To Date Safely and Respectfully

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Our Dedicated Approach to Your Safety

We are dedicated to keeping our online community safe, and we strongly believe it is our social responsibility to be leaders in safety and security in online dating. Whether you are a new or seasoned online dater, it’s important to know that you and your personal data are protected.

As part of our approach, our support team continuously works to educate the community on safety measures when communicating online. This includes advice on potential scams, how to avoid commercial solicitations, and ultimately, how to safely meet in real life.

Always keep your personal safety in mind, and follow these simple guidelines to reduce your risk of harm when meeting your match, both online and in person.

What you should expect to see on Seeking:

We believe that you can never have too much information when it comes to your personal safety, so we frequently compile tips to keep yourself safe before, during, and after your date, often shared on our blog or in emails to our members.
As many companies in the cyber safety space point out, information security should be like a layered cake. Seeking takes the same approach by implementing SSL certification, web application firewalls (WAF), advanced threat and bot detection software and third-party cyber security audits. Read this for a glimpse into Seeking’s Information Security.
There are notices throughout the platform warning members to never give bank or other financial information. If you suspect you are a victim of fraudulent behavior, please report it immediately to both Seeking and local authorities.
We encourage our users to report any suspicious behavior so we can investigate immediately. Our team has spent countless hours working to build and improve systems to balance quality, user privacy, and ethical behavior.

How We Use Technology to Help Protect You
Making a Safe Dating Profile
Dating Honestly and With Respect
Seeking’s Commitment to Safety
Seeking’s Safety Policies
How We Prohibit Transactional Dating
Limitations in Acting on Off-Service Behaviors
Seeking’s Photo & Video Guidelines
Seeking’s Community Guidelines
Sexual Health & Consent
Reporting Members

How We Use Technology To Help Protect You

Our commitment to keeping our members safe will never be compromised, and we frequently introduce new and enhanced safety features to our site.

We utilize user reports, meaning once a user is reported we can tie systems together to identify potential repeat scammers to keep them off our site.

We leverage AI at multiple touch points during our members’ journey to minimize the risks to their safety.

We work with multiple third parties that specifically identify, target, and block scam accounts.

We use human-in-the-loop (HITL), which includes both humans and AI, to fight potential fraudulent behaviors, including scams.

Making A Safe Dating Profile

Limit The Details You Share – Your personal details, including your full name, home address, place of work, financial information, phone number, and favorite local hang-out spots should remain a mystery. When creating your username, don’t use your first and last name – just use your first name or create a playful account username and email account with a flirty nickname.
Original Photos and Social Media – Use different photos for your dating profile than your social profiles. It’s easy to do a reverse image search with Google. If your dating profile has a photo that also shows up on your Instagram or Facebook account, it will be easy for someone to find you on social media. Also, avoid using photos that make places that you and your friends frequent too obvious. Remember, not all meetups are a perfect match, and privacy is key to moving on. Additionally, don’t link any online dating sites to your social channels. This is one of the fastest ways for someone to trace you and learn all about you, your friends and family.
Verified For Comfort – ID verification is the quickest and easiest way to ensure the person you’re chatting with is exactly who they say they are. Verify your account and don’t hesitate to ask your potential date to get their profile verified, too. Your personal information is never shared with one another, but verification will give you the extra confidence to go out and meet in person. Still in doubt? A quick phone call or video chat is an additional, simple way to verify your date is who they say they are before you meet in person. Making sure that both you and your potential match are verified is a great way to filter out potential doubts. Did you know that Seeking now has a video chat feature? Members with verified profiles or upgraded memberships can’t get enough of it! It’s an easy way to meet virtually before setting up in-person dates, and also a safe way to spend time together between dates. No need to share your email, phone number or social media handle—just some quality face-to-face time with new friends. For your safety, here are a few things to keep in mind when using the video chat:
1. Don’t share any of your personal information
2. Be aware of your background and avoid displaying private info in your shot
3. While we don’t record any of your video conversations, no video chat platforms can prevent members from recording their video chats
Nip Uncomfortable Conversations in the Bud – Take the appropriate measures to block and report the person who is making you feel uncomfortable. Our site provides many ways to anonymously report a member that makes you uncomfortable to make sure no one else is subject to that individual’s behavior.

Are You Ready to Date Safely?

Your personal safety is Seeking’s primary focus. It should be yours as well. As we continue to expand and enhance our safety features, we also want to help you feel more secure and confident when planning an in-person date. Here are a few things that you can do in preparation for your first in-person meeting:

Conduct personal research. Doing a little background research on a date prior to your meet-up is both a very common and a very smart move. Checking social accounts to make sure that your potential match is honest in who they say they are is a great way to filter out any potential doubts.
Always meet in a public place. As you’re planning your first in-person date, remember to always meet in a public place. Should you feel any pressure to meet in a private location, stress the importance of wanting to meet in public for the first couple of dates. If your date continues to push the subject, reevaluate meeting in person or end the conversation entirely.
Tell someone about your plans. Let a trusted friend or family member know the details of your date. There are never too many details to share when it comes to your safety.
Take precautionary defensive measures. Tucking some pepper spray in your purse when you go on a first date can help create peace of mind.
Consider making your first date a double date. If you can, go out with at least one other friend or couple to keep on eye each other in case someone is slipped a date rape drug or appears to be drinking too much. It’s also a great way to get a second opinion if you start getting bad vibes from a date.
Arrange your own transportation to and from the date. Drive your own car, take public transportation, call a friend or have a rideshare app to come get you. To make sure you get home safe and sound, don’t accept a ride or walk back with your date. This would let them know where you live and could result in them taking you somewhere else.
Keep private details private, for now – It’s always exciting getting to know someone new and sharing personal details about yourself and your immediate circle seems natural. On those initial dates, keep private details private, including your last name, address, and frequent hang-out spots, until you’ve built trust.
Be observant. Pay attention to the body language and facial expressions of the person you’re meeting.
Always keep an eye on your food and drinks – Never leave your food or drinks unattended. Should you have to step away from the table, place a napkin over your plate, and never feel bad about requesting a new drink.
Ensure your cell phone is fully charged and locations are on – Before, during, and after your date, make sure your cell phone has enough battery life and that your location settings are turned on to ensure a trusted family member or friend can track your location as needed. If you find yourself always on the move before a date, consider investing in a rechargeable cell phone case or portable charger.
Stay sober or make sure you watch your alcohol intake. Limit the amount of alcohol that you drink. Becoming impaired is an easy way to make yourself vulnerable.
Always have enough cash or a credit card on you to get home. Having some cash available to handle unexpected situations is the best way to feel comfortable when you’re on a date.
Trust your gut. If your instincts are telling you something is wrong, believe them. If you think someone has lied to you, you’re probably right. If you overlook it, you may end up regretting it later. Hanging around and trying to make it feel right is a risk not worth taking.
Have your “gotta go!” excuse ready. Don’t be afraid to leave a date prematurely. Come prepared and practice what you’ll say if you decide you want to leave early.
Don’t violate your values and ground rules. This includes not going home with him or her or inviting them inside your home. Never feel pressured into going somewhere or doing something you are uncomfortable with.
Report all suspicious and offensive behaviors. If you’ve ever felt uncomfortable or disrespected while interacting with someone while on a dating site or when you meet in person, be sure to report them through the proper channels within the respective app where you first connected. At Seeking, members can ‘Report a Member’ from the user’s profile. Pick the appropriate reason from the list and provide a clear description of the violation. You may also block the individual, which will prevent them from communicating with you and from seeing your profile. Customer Support is also available 24/7 and you can contact them here with any questions or concerns.

After a Date

If you are just not feeling a love connection, it’s okay to say so.

Feelings need to be mutual. If you are simply not interested in seeing someone again, be honest and tell them right away. If you feel that they won’t take it seriously, or don’t hear you, leave the date without plans for follow up and don’t be afraid to block their number or profile.
If you’re not feeling it, don’t be afraid to cut contact. After you tell your date that you’re not interested, don’t hesitate to stop taking their calls or messages. Continually responding “no” may only make the other person think you’re interested. Going off the grid is not rude, it’s a clear signal to back off.

IMPORTANT: If a member has threatened you or committed an act of violence or theft, please contact your local law enforcement agency and also report the member to Seeking to help protect the community.

Dating Honestly And With Respect

Life is too short to settle. That’s why we want our members to find those relationships that align most with their personal goals and dreams. Honesty and open communication have always been our core principles.

Dating Safely and Comfortably

Remember, your date is most likely as nervous as you are to meet in person for the first time. Be sure you’ve discussed any health or safety concerns before meeting up with your date. The pandemic may be easing restrictions in some areas, but there are many people who’d prefer to stick to the outdoors or continue with masked dates for now.

Also, be sure to include a more social get together option that doesn’t involve alcohol, like a trip to a local park, a museum or roller skating rink. That way, you and your date won’t feel pressured to drink if you don’t want to.

If you’re drinking, keep an eye on your drink. If you have to leave it for any length of time, you can always order a fresh one.

During the First Date

Approach each date as an opportunity to get to know someone better rather than going in with any expectations that your meetup should progress further. Be kind, embrace a positive attitude, and aim to have fun. This will help put you and your date at ease.

You are in full control of how things progress. If you don’t feel comfortable, it’s most important to put yourself first. Always feel free to politely leave the date. Neither of you owes each other anything, regardless of who pays for the meal.

If necessary, enlist the help of a waiter or your bartender to help to get you out of an uncomfortable situation. If you feel it’s more serious, have them help you organize a way to get home and alert their management.

Seeking’s Commitment to Safety

We employ different tools, processes, and policies to foster respectful communities and environments. The information provided below gives an overview of these technologies and methods. Depending on the needs of each platform and the audiences they serve, different tools may be adopted by different brands. However, the objective is universal: we are committed to creating a safe and positive experience for all our members on each and every one of our platforms.

While rare, we believe that any incident of misconduct or criminal behavior is one too many and that is why we are committed to work tirelessly to ensure that you and our community remains safe.

Seeking’s Safety & Security Features & Tools

Our security team uses industry-leading security monitoring tools featuring advanced AI threat detection and monitoring augmented with a dedicated monitoring team within a Security Operations Center. This team serves as first responders on the cyber front offering 24/7 and 365 protection in any time zone. The team works around the clock safeguarding against data and privacy theft.
We have the most sophisticated bot detection software on the market.
We safeguard all members’ personal information — including credit card data — with multiple layers of security, including encryption in transit and at rest. Users’ passwords are hashed and encrypted, and staff have no access to them.
Constant profile vetting to ensure the community is safe from deceitful members.
We have a giant technology infrastructure featuring security as the core.
All member data is encrypted and stored in an infrastructure exclusively controlled by Seeking.com.
We conduct both internal and external quarterly compliance audits:
- PCI Compliant – External
- Security Team – Internal
All of our websites are Transport Layer Security (TLS) secure. This is a cryptographic protocol designed to provide communications security over a computer network. The TLS protocol aims primarily to provide privacy and data integrity.
We provide regular and ongoing Privacy and Security Training for all staff

We use a network of trusted safety tools

Seeking uses a network of industry-leading automated and manual moderation and review tools, technology, process, and policies. We spend millions of dollars annually to prevent, detect, and remove people who engage in inappropriate behavior on our platforms. Examples of tools we use include:

Automatic scans of profiles upon creation for red-flag language and images;
Ongoing scans for fraudulent accounts or messaging activity; and
Manual reviews of suspicious profiles, activity, and user-generated reports.

We also depend on our members to report any profiles engaged in concerning behavior so that we can investigate and take appropriate action.

Background Checks

At Seeking, members have the ability to have a background search. After verification there is a badge that is posted on the member’s profile to show that they have been through the background check process.

Video and AI Technology

Seeking is integrating various features such as video chat, automated photo review, and photo verification, all of which aid our efforts to help our members ensure that every match is who they say they are. We are also incorporating anti-harassment prompts on our platforms, which use machine learning to automatically screen for potentially offensive messages and prompt the recipient to report the behavior.

Safety Resources

Seeking has in-app safety resources that equip daters with a comprehensive suite of information to keep members informed about the latest safety features while providing the most up-to-date information and tools in the online safety space. These resources are continually being updated and are evolving in collaboration with the safety experts on our Seeking Advisory Council.

Customer Care Teams

Seeking has its own robust customer care team dedicated to supporting our members and addressing any complaints or reports of bad behavior. Serious violations of our Terms of Use are reported to a centralized safety repository and cross-referenced across all our platforms to see if the member has other accounts on our other platforms. If any accounts are found, those accounts are blocked as well.

Seeking’s Safety Policies

We make every effort to identify, detect, and take appropriate actions to remove bad actors

At Seeking, we prohibit the following groups of people from using our product:

Anyone younger than 18 years of age;
Anyone who has been convicted or pleaded no contest to a felony and/or a violent or sexual crime;
Registered sex offenders; and
Anyone suspected of sex trafficking.

Seeking’s Terms of Use authorizes us to remove members who fall into any of the categories above, as well as to conduct searches of sex offender registries and other searches of publicly available records. If a member has been reported for domestic abuse, assault, or criminal activity (past or present) while they are active on our platforms, all accounts found that are associated with that member will be banned from our platforms.

We have a zero-tolerance policy for hate speech

We have a zero-tolerance policy for hate speech on our platforms. In addition to our human moderators and investment in technology to detect banned language, we encourage and rely on our network of members to report any inappropriate language so that our Customer Care teams can investigate and take appropriate action.

We ban and block underage users

With the combination of technology and human resources, Seeking works diligently to keep underage users off of our platforms. In addition to using sophisticated artificial intelligence, we collect birthdates, phone numbers, pictures, bios and other inputs used for age verification, as well as check profiles for red flags to keep underage users off our platforms. Human moderators also review accounts that have been flagged either by automated systems or by member reports, and act on those reports accordingly.

We do not allow prostitution, sex trafficking, or solicitation

Promoting or advocating for commercial sex services, human trafficking, or other non-consensual sexual acts is strictly prohibited and will result in your account being banned from all Seeking platforms. Solicitation of any kind is also prohibited. If the purpose of a profile is to advertise an event, business, non-profit, political campaign, contest, or to conduct research, we may delete and ban that account.

We ban and block fraudulent behavior and scams

Seeking has a dedicated team and sophisticated technology that detects and removes spam and fraud using a variety of tools including conducting automated and/or manual reviews of each member profile to block IP addresses from high-alert countries, identifying stolen credit card numbers, and detecting suspicious language in profiles. Seeking instructs members to never send money to someone they meet on our platforms, and to report any individual who asks that they do. These steps are designed to stop scams in their tracks and help protect the next potential victim.

For more information on romance scams and how to protect yourself, learn more from the Federal Trade Commission’s Consumer Information website.

If you believe you have been a victim of fraud on our platforms, you should report the scam on our platforms and contact local law enforcement.

Off-Service Conduct Policy

Seeking is committed to facilitating vibrant and dynamic communities, which can only happen if our members feel secure and protected. We believe that the occurrence of severe offenses committed by Seeking users that may take place entirely off our platforms (“off-service”) can create a substantial safety risk to the Seeking community. As a result, we will suspend and ban applicable accounts, up to an indefinite suspension on the first offense for some behaviors, even if the conduct took place offline or on other internet services, including:

Deadly violence and violent extremism;
Terrorist activities or recruiting;
Explicit and/or credible threats of mass violence (i.e., threats against a group of people, event, or location where people would gather);
Leadership or membership in a known hate group;
Carrying out or deliberately acting as an accomplice to non-consensual sexual activities and/or sexual assault;
Sexual exploitation of children, such as child grooming and solicitation/distribution of Child Sex and Abuse Materials (CSAM);
Actions that would directly and explicitly compromise the physical safety of the Seeking community; and
Explicit and/or credible threats against Seeking, including our staff.

We work to keep the Seeking community safe. We believe individuals who have engaged in the severe forms of abuse listed above are more likely to engage in behaviors on Seeking in violation of our Community Guidelines or create overt safety risks for our communities. As a consequence, we will apply these standards even if the target of these behaviors is not a Seeking member on one of our platforms, or the person engaging in abuse was not a Seeking member at the time the severe offense was committed. Persons who engage in these forms of severe abuse off-service are also prohibited from subsequently registering for other Seeking accounts on our platforms and any attempt to do so will lead to account termination.

We also recognize that toxicity and abuse can spread to Seeking from outside our services in a way that is detrimental to our community. To mitigate this harm, we will take reported off-service context into account when evaluating violations of any of our policies that occur on Seeking. If we are able to verify reports of off-service statements or behaviors that relate to an incident on Seeking, we will use this evidence to support and inform our suspension and ban decisions.

Because we have less context around behaviors that occur outside of Seeking, we generally require that evidence of these activities is verifiable before we will take action. In most cases, this includes direct links to public posts or content directly uploaded by the member. Screenshots and other content from third-parties that may be edited, doctored, or falsified are generally not considered to be sufficient unless they are supported by other verifiable evidence or confirmed by our third-party investigator as authentic. Additionally, we will consider law enforcement action(s) as an input when assessing the credibility of accusations and evidence.

Seeking will leverage third-party legal experts to assist in investigating severe offenses that occur outside of the Seeking services when needed. Members can contact the Seeking Off-Service Investigations Team to directly report cases of any off-service abuses listed above. These reports go directly to our global team responsible for investigating allegations of severe off-service offenses and are handled with complete confidentiality.

How We Prohibit Transactional Dating

Seeking has made significant enhancements to the site to ensure it provides a safe platform for members looking for genuine and authentic connections, not financial arrangements.

To this end, Seeking employs extensive measures to prevent any form of transactional or sugar dating, solicitation, or commercial exchange for sexual services, all of which are strictly prohibited by our Terms of Use. These measures include AI and human-in-the-loop (HITL) profile and message monitoring, proactive member education, extensive safety tips, penalties for violations of our Terms of Use and Community Guidelines, and easily accessible member reporting functionality:

Profile Monitoring: Seeking uses AI to scan profile content, images, and member behavior for patterns that may suggest violations of our Terms of Use and Community Guidelines. If something matches our violation criteria, suspicious members and their content are flagged and may trigger an automated punishment. In certain cases, a trained moderator may manually review the flagged content to determine whether a violation has occurred and what action should be taken.

Real-Time Message Monitoring: Messages suggesting transactional or compensated dating may trigger an immediate warning to the potentially offending member, giving the member an opportunity to evaluate whether they were in violation of our Terms of Use and Community Guidelines and adjust their behavior accordingly. To protect our members’ privacy, direct messages aren’t reviewed by our human team members unless they have been flagged for potential violations.

Member Penalties and Bans from Seeking.com: First-time offenders who violate our Terms of Use and/or Community Guidelines and ignore the subsequent warning receive a temporary suspension and are required to view an educational video and take a quiz on our Community Guidelines. Repeat offenses escalate to longer suspensions, and penalized members will experience restricted search visibility with newer members for an extended period post-suspension. Continued violations may result in a permanent ban from the site, pursuant to our Terms of Use.

While Seeking cannot control what happens when members meet in person, we share detailed Safe Dating Tips with our members and maintain an easy-to-use “Report Member” function within the site where members can flag suspicious or illegal behavior at the click of a button.

Limitations in Acting on Off-Service Behaviors

Seeking has established this policy to protect the safety of our members. Because of this, persons who have carried out severe offenses and created a safety risk will be prohibited from using our services. However, in cases where these behaviors have occurred in the distant past, users have gone through a trusted rehabilitation process, such as legally mandated time served in a correctional facility, and our investigative process determines that there is no evidence to suggest that the user would cause any clear and present danger to the community, we may decline to take action against a user or reactivate their account based on an appeal. For particularly egregious offenses that present a physical safety risk to the community, suspensions or bans will not be eligible for appeal, no matter how much time has elapsed.

Account Takeover Prevention

While Seeking has not experienced a major data breach, other large platforms have and that can expose your email/password credentials if you have used the same credentials on Seeking. If you do not login to your account for 180 days, we will reset your password and you will need to create a new one by verifying a link in an email sent to the email account you used to set up your membership. This extra security process is designed to protect your account and private details over the long term.

Campaign for Secure Dating Advisory Council

Formed in 2021, the Campaign for Secure Dating Advisory Council is a group of leading experts and advocates involved in the study and prevention of sexual assault, sex trafficking, abuse, harassment, and similar issues. The council regularly makes recommendations on how to improve safety on the Seeking platforms.

Government Relations

We support comprehensive safety laws and regulations

As a leader in connecting people, we believe we have an important role to play in defining the standards for all players in our industry. That’s why we work closely with legislators and regulators across the globe to define and pass new safety-focused laws that can help make both our members and those on other tech platforms safe.

We welcome the opportunity to work with governments around the world to make the internet a safer place for everyone.

Seeking’s Photo & Video Guidelines

When uploading either a public or private photo, please follow the rules listed below. Photos that violate the guidelines will be denied, and your account may be suspended.

All photos must include yourself.

Acceptable photos include:

Bottom nose to chin photos.
Partially blurred or masked photos.
Clothed photos of your body without your face.
Photos featuring luxury items (houses, cars, yachts) if you are also in the photo.
Photos of your body where all private areas are fully covered.

Photos that will NOT be accepted:

Photos without you in them (e.g., stock images, celebrities, objects, landscapes).
Extreme close-ups (focused solely on lips, hands, feet, chest).
Photos featuring minors (including family photos, childhood pictures, or any images where minors are visible in the background).
Nude or sexually explicit photos (this includes full nudity, see-through clothing, exposed pelvic regions, sheer lingerie, body paint coverage, or sexually suggestive poses).
Photos containing illegal or inappropriate content (e.g., weapons, drug paraphernalia, graphic injuries, violence, currency).
Duplicate photos (repeated uploads of the same image).
Photos sourced from third parties, other Seeking members or copyrighted content (e.g., photos taken from social media or professional shoots with visible watermarks).
Improperly rotated or cropped images (images that are sideways or incomplete).
Photos with personal contact information or business logos (email addresses, phone numbers, social media handles, watermarks).

Your primary profile photo is the first image other users see and must meet higher visibility standards.

Primary Photo Guidelines:

Must feature your unobstructed face (no masks, extreme shadows, or far-distance shots).

Must only include you (no group photos, even if you are the main focus).

Should be an authentic representation of you (overly edited or AI-generated photos may be denied).

Primary Photos that will NOT be accepted:

Provocative poses or suggestive imagery are not permitted (e.g., bending over, excessive body contact, fully clothed but touching private regions).

Indoor swimwear, lingerie, or shirtless photos are not allowed as a primary profile photo.

If you believe a photo violates these guidelines or someone is misusing your image, please report it to customer support via a support ticket here. Seeking reserves the right to deny any content at our discretion.

Seeking’s Community Guidelines

What you do or say off our platform is not our business, as long as you do not break any laws. However, while on Seeking.com, we need you to abide by our guidelines and keep our community classy.

The Seeking platforms may be used only for lawful purposes by individuals looking for romantic relationships. As one of the conditions of your use of our platforms and services, you represent, warrant, and agree that you will not use (or plan, encourage or help others to use) our platforms or services for any purpose or in any manner that is prohibited by the Seeking Terms of Use or by applicable law. It is your responsibility to ensure that your use of the Seeking platforms and services complies with the applicable Terms of Use, and to seek prior written consent from Seeking for any uses not permitted or not expressly specified herein. Seeking specifically prohibits any use of its platforms or services, and you hereby agree not to use the Seeking platforms or services, for any of the following:

Using the platforms and services as an escort or prostitute or using the platforms and services to promote, solicit, or engage clients for an escort or prostitution service, or to engage or facilitate human trafficking of any kind, including past escort activities or affiliation with an escort site or service;
Posting or sending material that exploits people under the age of 18, soliciting personal information from anyone under 18, failing to report a person suspected to be under the age of 18 to [email protected], or continuing to use the site to interact in any way with anyone you know or have reason to suspect is under the age of 18. Any violation of these prohibitions will result in termination of your membership and possible referral to law enforcement or other agencies, such as the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children
Posting any incomplete, false, misleading or inaccurate content about yourself and/or your profile;
Posting any content that is not entirely your own or which you do not have full rights to use;
Impersonating or otherwise misrepresenting an affiliation, connection or association with any person or entity;
If you have a password, allowing any other person to access a non-public area of the Seeking platforms or services, disclosing or sharing your password to or with any third parties or using your password for any unauthorized purpose; using meta tags or code or other devices containing any reference (express or implied) to the Seeking platforms or services (or any trademark, trade name, service mark, logo or slogan of our platforms or services) to direct any person to any other website for any purpose;
Soliciting, from other members, passwords or personal identifying information for commercial or unlawful purposes, or for any other reason that would constitute a violation of Seeking’s Terms of Use;
Engaging in advertising to, or solicitation of, other members to send money, or buy or sell any products or services. You may not transmit any chain letters or junk/spam email to other members. If you breach the terms of this subsection and send or post unsolicited bulk email, spam, or other unsolicited communications of any kind through Seeking’s services, you acknowledge that you will have caused substantial harm to Seeking;
Initiating contact with members off site by any other means without first obtaining explicit permission from them to do so via the Seeking platform;
Posting advertisements or solicitations of employment, business or schemes or on behalf of any organizations;
Using Seeking for activities that violate any law, statute, ordinance or regulation;
Using Seeking to encourage, promote, facilitate or instruct others to engage in illegal activity;
Engage in any activity that violates criminal laws of the jurisdiction in which the member resides, visits or contacts members;
Bullying, stalking, intimidating or otherwise harassing any other members or Seeking’s employees or representatives;
Framing or mirroring any part of the Seeking platforms or services without Seeking’s prior written authorization;
Using our services in order to damage Seeking or any related websites, affiliates or subsidiaries;
Using the Seeking platforms and services for any competitive purpose, including copying, soliciting, competitive or market analysis or any other use by a competitor;
Recruiting for any other purpose, including for pornography, modeling, or escort sites or brothels;
Using the Seeking platforms or services for commercial use. This includes but is not limited to selling products, promoting a business, or recruiting for jobs, offering paid services such as selling photos, personal promotions, or modeling gigs. Our platforms and services are for personal use only. Profiles engaging in commercial activity will be denied, and further action may be taken under the User Violation Guidelines;
Seeking strictly prohibits any form of compensated companionship, including references to or arrangements involving companionship, dating, or intimacy in exchange for money, gifts, financial support, mentorship, or other valuable benefits. This includes, but is not limited to:
- References to “sugar dating,” including terms like “sugar daddies,” “sugar mamas,” or “sugar babies.”
- Mentions of “PPM,” “allowance,” or specific monetary amounts in relation to companionship or relationships.
- Offers or requests for paid dates, financial arrangements, or transactional intimacy.
- Promotion of services such as escorting, prostitution, intimate massage, cuddling services, or any other form of paid companionship.
- Attempts to facilitate or negotiate any type of compensation for personal interaction.
Profiles containing such content will be denied, and any attempts to engage in these activities may result in suspension or termination of your account, with potential further action in accordance with the User Violation Guidelines;
Any other use that violates any applicable law, including without limitation, laws related to export controls.

Sexual Health

How to Talk About Safer Sex with a Potential Partner

When talking to a partner or potential partner, be clear about your expectations and any concerns. You might want to know:

What birth control is being used?
What protection against sexually transmitted infections (STIs) is being used?
When was the last time your partner was tested for STIs?

If these questions make you uncomfortable, it may be easier to begin the conversation by giving your own information first — for instance, “Just so you know, I was last tested for STIs a couple of months ago, and I haven’t slept with anyone since. Also, I’m on birth control, but it’s still important to me that I use a condom every time. Do you have any preferences that I should know about?”

The Importance of Routine Testing

According to the National Coalition for Sexual Health, recommended STI testing frequency varies based on your relationship status and your sexual activity. If you’re coming out of quarantine “single and ready to mingle,” it would be ideal to have an initial, all-encompassing screening that looks for common STIs like chlamydia, gonorrhea, HSV-2, syphilis, hepatitis, and HIV.

The CDC says that both gender and age factor into which tests you should be prioritizing, and how often you should seek testing. Talking with your primary care provider can help determine the STI testing schedule that will best suit you and your needs.

Getting tested for STIs before having sex with a new partner is always a good idea — though this may not be feasible for some people. If you are having sex with new partners frequently, it’s a good idea to talk frankly with your primary care provider about an STI screening schedule and safe sex precautions that will help keep you and your partners healthy.

How to Talk to Your Doctor About Your Sex Life

Your healthcare team is there to help you be the healthiest you can be, and that includes your sexual health. Medical professionals are healthcare experts, but they are also humans who understand that sex is an important aspect of life. Building a trusting relationship with a primary care provider will make it easier to discuss potentially sensitive subjects such as sex. If you feel uncomfortable bringing up certain topics with your doctor, it may be helpful to write your concerns down before your visit (so you have something to refer to) and to express your nervousness in an honest way — for instance, saying something like “This is hard for me to talk about.”

A frank discussion about your sexual health will help your provider be a better partner for you in your health.

Consent

Consent means actively agreeing to be sexual with someone. Consent lets someone know that sex is wanted. Sexual activity without consent is rape or sexual assault.

What is consent?

Sexual consent is an agreement to participate in a sexual activity. Before being sexual with someone, you need to know if they want to be sexual with you too. It’s also important to be honest with your partner about what you want and don’t want.

Consenting and asking for consent are all about setting your personal boundaries and respecting those of your partner — and checking in if things aren’t clear. Both people must agree to sex — every single time — for it to be consensual.

Without consent, sexual activity (including oral sex, genital touching, and vaginal or anal penetration) is sexual assault or rape.

Consent is as easy as FRIES:

Freely given. Consenting is a choice you make without pressure, manipulation, or under the influence of drugs or alcohol.
Reversible. Anyone can change their mind about what they feel like doing, anytime. Even if you’ve done it before, and even if you’re both naked in bed.
Informed. You can only consent to something if you have the full story. For example, if someone says they’ll use a condom and then they don’t, there isn’t full consent.
Enthusiastic. When it comes to sex, you should only participate in activities you WANT to do, not things that you feel you’re expected to do.
Specific. Saying yes to one thing (like going to the bedroom to make out) doesn’t mean you’ve said yes to others (like having sex).

You get the final say over what happens with your body. It doesn’t matter if you’ve hooked up before or even if you said yes earlier and then changed your mind. You’re allowed to say “stop” at any time, and your partner needs to respect that.

Consent is never implied by things like your past behavior, what you wear, or where you go. Sexual consent is always clearly communicated — there should be no question or mystery. Silence is not consent. And it’s not just important the first time you’re with someone. Couples who’ve had sex before or even ones who’ve been together for a long time also need to consent before sex — every time.

There are laws about who can consent and who can’t. People who are drunk, high, or passed out can’t consent to sex. There are also laws to protect minors (people under the age of 18) from being pressured into sex with someone much older than them.

The age of sexual consent is how old a person needs to be in order to be considered legally capable of consenting to sex. Adults who have sex with someone younger than the age of consent face jail time and will be registered as a sex offender. The age of consent varies in different parts of the U.S. and in different countries. There may also be other laws that define the age of sexual consent by state.

What is sexual assault and what is rape?

Rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse can have different legal definitions. In general, rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse are forms of violence in which there is sexual contact without consent — including vaginal or anal penetration, oral sex, and genital touching.

In the U.S. the legal definitions of rape and sexual assault vary. Some states use these terms interchangeably, while others define them differently. Often, people will use the term “sexual assault” to refer to any kind of non-consensual sexual contact, and use the term “rape” to mean sexual contact that includes penetration.

Anyone can be a victim — no matter their gender, sexual orientation, or age. But certain groups of people are more likely than others to experience sexual assault in their lives. Women (especially women of color), LGBT identified people, and people with developmental disabilities are more likely to experience sexual assault over the course of their lifetimes.

Sexual violence doesn’t happen in one single way. There doesn’t need to be a weapon involved and the victim doesn’t need to have fought back, screamed, or said “no” repeatedly in order for it to count as rape or sexual assault. Most sexual assaults don’t happen by strangers in dark alleyways. Often, it’s someone the victim knows or even a romantic partner. If you or someone you know has experienced this type of violence, you’re not alone, and help is available.

Sexual violence, or sexual assault/abuse, refers to any type of unwanted sexual contact – including pressuring someone to do something sexually they don’t want to do or don’t consent to. It can also refer to behavior that impacts a person’s ability to control their sexual activity or the circumstances in which sexual activity occurs, like restricting access to birth control and condoms, or sexual activity with someone who is very drunk, drugged, or unconscious.

It’s important to remember that no matter the circumstance, sexual violence is never the victim’s fault. Everyone has the right to decide what they do or don’t want to do sexually.

Reporting Members

Click here to submit a report

If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call 911.
Report members who request sexual offers in exchange for money.
Report members who identify themselves as escorts or prostitutes since this is strictly against the Seeking Terms of Use.
Report any member guilty of online harassment.
Report anyone who asks for money upfront and before meeting in person. This includes, but is not limited to, sob stories asking for money, and individuals needing to pay their cell phone bills.
Report members who ask for your address so they can send you gifts.
Report members who ask for your bank account details, including account numbers or passwords.
Report any members who are looking for individuals under 18 years of age.
Report any members who tell you that they are under 18 years of age.
If you believe you are a victim of human trafficking or may have information about a potential trafficking situation, please contact the National Human Trafficking Hotline at (888) 373-7888 or via SMS “BEFREE”/233733 (Text “HELP” or “INFO”).
To report suspected human trafficking to Federal law enforcement, please call (866) 347-2423.

Response to Reports of Assault

We encourage members to report all instances of abuse or assault

All members of Seeking are able to easily report instances of abuse or assault in the app or online. When a member reports abuse or assault to Seeking, we review and take necessary action, which can include identifying the member and blocking any associated accounts that are found on the Seeking platforms.

We partner with law enforcement

We pride ourselves on our support to and cooperation with law enforcement, and stand ready to assist in any active investigations.

We also work with law enforcement proactively to report things like potential violence, self-harm, and other imminent physical harm. In each instance, we work collaboratively with law enforcement to get them what they need without objections or delay.

Click here to submit a report.